Vol. XIV · No. ∞ · Ethically Smug Since 2009

The Daily Grind

Single-Origin Opinions for the Discerning, the Tired, and the Broke
A Sanctuary for People Who Are Right About Coffee

We Need To Talk About Your Mouthfeel (And Why It's Wrong)

ORIGIN: An unmarked espresso bar with no menu, Melbourne
TASTING NOTES: Velvet, Silk, Your inadequacy, Tannins of self-doubt
VERDICT: N/A — this is a lecture, not a review
RECOMMENDED PAIRING: Unbroken eye contact and an air of disappointment

Mouthfeel. Say it slowly. Now realize you've never actually experienced it, because you drink your coffee at a 'normal temperature' like a coward and a centrist.

I recently visited an espresso bar with no sign, no menu, and a barista named Wren who communicates primarily through disappointed exhaling. You order by describing your emotional state. I described mine as 'autumnal.' Wren nodded once. I have never felt so seen.

The espresso arrived in a thimble. 18 grams in, 36 grams out, 27 seconds, pulled by a man who has a tattoo of a tamper on his neck. The crema was the color of a confession.

The mouthfeel was, and I cannot stress this enough, *architectural*. It had load-bearing walls. It had a foyer. I rolled it across my palate for several minutes while other customers waited and silently judged my dedication.

“Velvet, but make it a personality.”

If you have ever said the words 'I just like it to taste like coffee,' please understand that you are the reason artisans are suffering. Educate yourself. The reading list is 340 books long. I'll wait.

#singleorigin#nooatmilk#terroir#mouthfeel#thirdwave#fourthwaveactually#youwouldntget it
← Back to the manifesto
Continue your education

The Flat White Is Dead and We Killed It With Convenience